for once I have some happy news....

I have a boyfriend... for the first time in years.
and he knows... everything, and he still tells me that he loves me everyday. I am so happy :) but yet there is still that part of me that can't quite trust that it's all happening...

I'm starting to eat a little in front of him, but most of the time I just restrict. It does mean that I don't binge though, and that part is good.
I just never thought that I would find someone who would know how messed up I am, and love me anyways.

We're talking about moving in together, and that part scares me... I've never purged when he's been at my place, but I know, that if we live together, there will come a time where I have to purge, and he's going to be there. I just don't know if he'll really know what all this is in my life until he experiences it. To say that you're ok with something is one thing, but to see it firsthand and then to actually be ok with it is entirely different.

I really do love him, and Im just so scared that I am going to lose him.